Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Nope someone who see's the world differently to you is all,but you struggle to accept it.:yelrotflm

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Make sure all read the last line again...

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Jumping in and calling most posters here fakers and to HTFU is your opinion and you're entitled to it.

However, one post to let us know your feelings about the topic would have been quite sufficient, instead of insisting in pushing your agenda down everyone's throats.

We now all know how you feel about the subject, so leave it at that and move on please.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Actaully I didn't call people on here fakers you assumed that bud.

Thats twice you asked nicely

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Diagnosed depression has nothing to do with the lack of material possessions. Plenty of people in remote regional areas of this country are also living in third world standards.

We are lucky enough to live in a decadent western society that's capable of affording the help people need. It's not as simple as buying material items as a cure. You too are confusing diagnosed depression with the 'I'm sad because mummy didn't buy me an XBox' set.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Oh I read it, and can vouch for the author's description of third world life 100%. Where we differ though is that I reckon (and I'm not the only one) that the so-called decadent Western lifestyle is the cause of the depression endemic being experienced. There will always be a small group of whingers that will never be happy with anything and will be forever complaining about something or other. However, you seem to tar far too many people with the same brush when all they need is some help.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

I read it and it is all subjective. He says that because he comes from a place like we have. To those people, it may be paradise. Not saying it cannot be improved, but to whose standards? theirs or ours? Whole new argument.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

You make some observations that have a certain logic.

But, people are inherently no different. Fact is in Australia, with the secure life we generally have, many people are socially dissociated, and many are pressured by technology, work and lifestyles.

Those people living in 3rd world countries, transplant them into a lifestyle in Australia subject to depression stressors and likely they will fall to the black dog.

Likewise, take a person who is depressed in Australia, say due to pressures of running a regional farm with limited social contact and economic pressures, and parachute that person into a 3rd world village where it is a struggle to survive, that person would have a different mental focus and mental health.

People are not different, thing is like cancer, depression in Australia has multiple and sometimes multi factorial causes, and things like social isolation, economic pressures, disempowerment in workplace, shell shock work pressures, technology in the form of e-mails sms, 24 hour phone calls sure as heck do not help.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

I can agree with some of your sentiments but the bolded part is what gets me annoyed. Exactly how is a man supposed to act?? Not every man follows footy, wears thongs, smokes, drinks and drives a ute like the stereotypical aussie male.

That's the problem with society, we are forced to be pigeon holed and categorised and it should be everyone's business to know. Boys should like blue and girls pink. Everyone should be married or have a partner. Religion. Sexuality.............................

I thinks many problems of the world would be solved if people were left to be themselves, free from judgement and stereotypical categories.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Can we all get back on topic now.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

sorry off topic and bad taste given thread.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Guys, Can I ask that if you want to post up your thoughts in this thread, that you please be mindful of the many members who use this thread as a support mechanism.

They may not always reply to a post, but I know that many of our AFF family do read these posts and it can effect them in different ways that potentially some of us don't understand.

Everyone has their right to have a say, and I respect that, but imho, this is one thread that should not be an argumentative thread.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

I'd love to reply but apparently if I do Im been argumentative? Go figure ?

I accept and understand your feelings but if I'm to honest I will offend those less than realistic then gain more warning points based on the fact I don't believe most men are been honest,just sooky?

Not really a open forum when I get warnings but others like can threaten me and not receive sanction.Its a forum after all but watching people suffer thru depression is serious stuff and not to be taken lightly but most think to argue instead of read the true msg I said. I'm not gunna hide from my feelings or thoughts from anyone. Nor did my mate tonight who battles depression daily and understands and supports my point of view after spending 6 hrs with him this evening. My feeling on how a man should act is be what ever his family or surroundings need him to be and how he chose to place him self. Meaning if he choose to be with a girl and gets a kid as a result he should be the or part provider for that unit if he chooses to move on or not but he has his purpose to up hold. Nothing more or less based on his choices.Choices...not adding or leaving any out his or partners choices. None of this I slept with 3 girls got em all preggers cos I was depressed even though they were mates wives. My whole point they were not depressed just depressed the got caught out for bad choices.

FYI we celebrated a mates pregnancy to this mrs tonight.Big step and life style change for a man but apparently after my 2 kids I don't know any thing about that or stress or been a adult or the struggle that is depression after helping family and friends thru it like Will. Maybe I should of stayed home instead of supported there great news ?

Just a chip on the shoulder carrier instead of a friend...but Will doesn't think so either doe's Mel my SIL but hey some on the internet know not me who has to deal with it everyday via helping them along.Neither never complain or judge me but I must be wrong even though both told me otherwise today without pointing it out? Who would of thought but again how would I know right ???

I'll say it again...men need to be proud men again not be allowed to have angles to push into soft whimpy sooks with blame in there eyes instead of pride and commitment based on there choices and no fakes.My whole point all along,nothing more or less and my view will not change cos some say I should.If I make a mistake I'll wear it if not I stand up for what I believe in cos I'm honest.

Thats it and all it will be and there will be no replies or judging just my view on it with no hang up's from me.

Have a nice day all or do what ever you want cos I just don't care :)

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Hey Mex - PM sent

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

If only that was truly the case! Unfortunately, the clinical evidence is totally at odds with this out-of-date mindset. Male depressive illnesses have been acknowledged as existing in even the most responsible and outwardly confident men the world over. Depression is defined as a "hidden" disability, which is why—sadly—far too many people dismiss it as nothing more than a cop-out or any easy escape from the real world, along with an "excuse" to under-perform or deny any responsibility for their actions.

From the Australian Beyondblue web site...

It may be a good idea for you to read through some of the Beyondblue site and gain some sort of understanding of the male depressive issues that you seem to be unaware of. And it's not really helpful to tell depressed people that there's no such thing, or that they're faking it—particularly in a thread devoted to discussing these issues.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Mex, you may have good arguments for some of your points, but what we are saying is that this thread is not the place to argue them on. Why not start a new thread yourself and see how it flies?

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Mex 351

I really do not think you truly comprehend the black hole of depression. It can suck you in so you see no light, black, no joy or sense of anything being worthwhile, and for some it morphs into a physiological disability with chemical imbalances (eg serotonin ) in the brain.

Some people have inherent problems with serotonin receptors or serotonin levels and need lifelong psychiatric medication leveling to function.

Many and varied reasons that one can be sucked in to the black dog even if you do not have such hard wiring chemical problems, with subjective and objective factors at play.

In my profession there is a certain niche, which I chose not to pursue because I did some, and I did not feel good about it-felt black afterwards, other people who focus on it, a lot of them require weekly counseling to keep functioning. Someone needs to do this work for the community, but not me, I know I do not have the mental fortitude to do it-and the people who do and suffer depression and cope with counseling are incredibly strong....

Some people can step away from the darkness with constructive small steps, others need help with chemicals and support networks.

You are entitled to your opinion, but it is rather puerile and quite frankly insensitive and hurtful to sufferers who are often incredibly strong to be able to keep functioning, often for the benefit of people who rely on them, despite being in the black dog.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Is it safe to come out now.. has the bad man gone..?
He didn't like me... he never said it to my face.. but I could tell.
Thank you all.. that includes our supportive Moderators.. for understanding the need for release of our unhealthy thoughts that can bottle up and pop under pressure or we don't look and talk Beyond

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

There are good mates here you have never even met.
I've started going to AA before a problem became a big problem. Some of the stories make me cringe. But today, these story tellers, male and female, young and old are saying they haven't touched a drop in decades, or alternatively, a day.
No judgement, no pressure. Alcoholics know one another.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

You know, when i read the first couple of posts you made my first thoughts were this is back lash from Gary Lyon's antics.
The fact that you have referred to the incident is telling.

I agree and the general concensus was that the drama surrounding the situation has not helped the genuine cause.
Most people believe GL used mental illness to lessen his responsibility in the situation, given, but that doesnt mean that depression isnt a real problem for many.

Is male depression on the rise, yes.
Is that rise a result of societies acceptance that men can be depressed, no doubt.
Does that mean that we are all becoming sook's, no, just means those who suffered in silence before can now be heard and helped.

Where's the problem.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

a junkie can still have morals n a good heart, if you offer the right type of help that won't allow them to abuse it, therefore keeping their self esteem at a possible level to want to keep on the right path, to never feel judgement, to be reassured of mortality and understanding factors that mould us as indviduals, and a trust that will ONLY BE OFFERED if they wish to not abuse in anyway, for assured continuous support to fall back on if needed. NO JUDGEMENT IF WE DO OR DONT, CAN BUT WON'T, CAN'T BUT WILL TRY AGAIN, AND AGAIN...
after all no matter how many councilling sessions i have received over the years and given noted advice to in return, i can't seem to apply all i KNOW to help myself, just a fact of mental disorders.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

As bad as the people in third world countries lives are and everything they go through to survive.
this doesn't mean the problems we have are not important. Just because our society has moved further and we experience different problems doesn't mean out problems are not important. especially health ones

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Life has too many unanswered questions. It seems the only way to enjoy it is to live in the moment and not question anything. Is that how a 'normal' functioning human lives? Ignorance is bliss, but what happens when one is no longer content with living like this? Questions like: 'Why are we born ?' 'Did I have a choice to be born or not?' 'Why be happy if everything is temporal?' 'Why sleep if you have to wake up again?' 'Why eat if you will get hungry again?' 'If there is no birth, there is no death, so therefore being born is extremely cruel, so birth is a tragedy?' Once these thoughts bombard you long enough, waking up becomes a chore, eating becomes a chore, existing itself becomes a chore.. Everything grows meaningless, reality itself looks more and more like a big scam, a big illusion and so does 'happiness' or whatever that means. No amount of money, affection, material possessions can really create that mythical 'happiness'. So what is happiness? Being able to maintain a neutral balance of emotions? If one were constantly happy, wouldn't they then be insane ? So what is the opposite of depression, if one has most probably slipped into depression? Is it the care free , gullible mindset of a child which always hopes for the best, believes in 'forever' before all these concepts are dented, scratched and destroyed by the elements of this cruel existence ?

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

The same thoughts and ideas were coursing through my head today Mr Malazn...

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

I have had depression for a long time... Decades even, mostly brought about by bad choices and decisions ... like typing on the interwebs for example ?

Those that truly know me are well aware i wear my heart on my sleeve and i never back down from a challenge regardless of the financial burden i have created sometimes on myself and my family.

Available cash flow can be a constant cause for Depression, but with careful planning i believe we can all have meaningful things and most importantly a fruitful and enjoyable quality of life.

We all just need to keep looking through the smoke until we find the light.

Message to the Haters:

Whenever someone criticizes you they are telling you their story NOT YOURS... Some people give up real easy and lose the drive to carry on.

They try, they GIVE UP then develop a false perception about it or anything similar.

The sad thing about some haters is that they ASSUME and never try because they have already sabotaged their abilities and have SET LIMITATIONS ON THEM SELVES then try to impose THEIR OWN LIMITATIONS (ON YOU).

Be careful who you let influence you, some people are positive and full of encouragement and some are full of negativity, LIMITATIONS and POISON.

When I pursue any task I do it with 110% PASSION & EFFORT and I don't let anybody tell me I CANT or STOP ME, YOU DO THE SAME...

Peace out and have a great week :)

Daz

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Great post DAZZLR. Also Malazn Mafia's post touched a nerve. Having gone three solid rounds with the black dog in the last ten years I am fairly well tuned into where I'm at most of the time, and lately too much of what Malazn outlined is creeping in... even after the most awesome day out at the beach with my kids I still find myself wondering whether it's worth bothering too much when it comes to planning or generally making an effort. Fatigue is also an issue for me lately. All classic signals, but I don't want to go back to ADs because while they help they also take the edge off all the good/great emotions too. So what to do - well, cut back on alcohol intake and bump up the physical exercise for starters, so that's what I'm doing... trying to do. And connecting with people more - I live a pretty lonely existence Mon-Fri, which certainly doesn't help.

My two cents on the earlier discourse - helping someone who has clinical depression may be an eye-opener to someone with a closed mind, but it still comes nowhere near close to giving them a real understanding of clinical depression.

Unless you have been there yourself you are highly unlikely to be able to join the dots. A strong sense of empathy isn't enough unless you can also appreciate what a depressed person is actually going through. But even when I lived with my ex she really didn't seem to 'see' how totally wrecked I was when I was at my lowest.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

Congratulations Mex, you are part of the problem.

Please consider the consequences of your words, people reading them who are in a bad place today may feel you are minimising their battle.
If you cant offer constructive, supportive input then GTFO.

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

YES!! good to have positive posts to start the day, I'm off to purchase a Notebook to replace this annoying extra large smartphone (tablet), AS I'M FINALLY GETTING THE HANG OF INTERWEB and utilising techno..tological...soft where? and hope harvey gives me 6months interest free credit, spent all savings on Fairmont and i don't have a credit rating cause I've haven't had a loan or credit card since in my 20s.
good day good thoughts good mind to all LATER T

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

If it helps, for any low income earners there is an option of a Step up loan or a Nils loan.... They are not credit cards they are finance to low income earners who need white goods, computers or car repairs etc. repayments are fixed and low and it's designed to help people get ahead without paying disgustingly high fees and interest. Just google step up loan (thru the NAB) or NILS. Might suit depending on your circumstances. :)

Re: Depression, Anxiety
 

^^^ Good post snopony.

Also, if you're on Centrelink benefits - even partial like me, you can apply for a interest free loan over 12 months.

I'm on partial Newstart allowance as I have a casual job and income varies. Can apply for a hardship loan of $500. You just have to demonstrate that you can afford to pay it back and nominate what you can pay back out of your benefit per fortnight. Centrelink just reduce your fortnightly benefit on the agreed amount. You can pay over the specified amount when times turn good. Has pulled me out of the "poo" a few times - hate borrowing coin though.

Cheers!